Elephant in the Room: Skirts and the Male Bulge

One issue for a number of skirted males, is whether to obscure the appearance of a bulge. We'll explore different perspectives, along with a look at the textiles, prints, tailoring, and accessories that can help.

Plenty of males in the 60s and 70s had no issue with letting their bulge be known. Not just rock stars (but definitely, musicians).

Male bulges are more or less accepted in ballet, bicycle racing, football, swimming, and figure skating. They're fairly normalized under jeans, although a denim fly can obscure things.

With female bodies, there’s a full spectrum of concern on the topic of ‘cameltoe’ in pants or tights—many don’t give it a single thought, and some act like it’s the worst thing to ever happen. Not to mention concern around VPL (visible panty line), or the market for nipple covers.

Back on the male side, some might think they should have a big bulge, if anything. Sadly, even progressive people still make jokes and insults about size, like it matters.

We all have different bodies. If someone with male anatomy wears constricting attire to hide the bulge, they lose one of the best features of skirts: open, airy, freedom. Quite the opposite of jeans: 

So why would males ever want to hide their anatomy? We’re not female—why should we pretend to be? And we’re not Ken dolls.

Avoiding attention

Some people obsess over what’s going on ‘down there’. They see someone who doesn’t fit the “normal” sex they’re used to seeing in a skirt, and glance (or worse, stare) at your junk. Growing awareness of trans people can amplify this obsession with genitalia as well.

Males who wear skirts might not enjoy this attention.

Minimalism

Some may want a minimalist look. Even male ballet dancers wear a ‘dance belt’ which is like a flexible jock strap that presents a “smooth and inexplicit contour to onlookers”.

This desire may come from the flush female look that society might call a “normal” skirt aesthetic:

Bodily discomfort and double standards

Though bulges are standard in swimming, speedos can be deemed ‘creepy’ in certain pockets of culture. Whether this comes from a discomfort with bodies in general, trauma, or something else, ideas like this can weigh on a skirted male.

Males in many cultures don’t have the clothing freedom available to females, for example, in showing curvature, flaunting their legs, etc.

Environment

Around family or children, males might be hyper aware of any appearance of their bulge, and wear specific skirts, if at all. Like the speedo example, this can come from a cultural idea that certain body parts should be hidden as much as possible.

At work, males are less likely to wear skirts—especially those that accentuate the bulge. This could stem from fear of job loss, not being promoted, or excessive caution around indecency.

Other surroundings where males might avoid bulgy skirts are religious settings, public transportation, and conservative societies. Not wanting to add fire to recent anti-trans rhetoric is also valid.

Windy days can also put your anatomy on display, with certain skirts.

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Whatever the reason, there’s no shame in hiding or obscuring the bulge. Just like there’s no shame in avoiding spandex shorts for a grocery run.

How to hide the bulge

This isn’t an article about tucking. It’s about how to make the bulge less apparent by choosing certain skirts and accessories. Don’t worry—constricting attire is not necessary.

To understand what makes the bulge more or less apparent, we’ve grouped things into four areas:

A thin, clingy skirt compared to rigid denim with a fly:

A stretchy, tight miniskirt compared to a thick, wool skirt:

Bright vs. dark (shadows have more contrast with brighter colours):

Aside from high-contrast geometric patterns (ie. black and white checkerboard), irregular patterns will generally hide the bulge more.

Solid colour vs. irregular pattern:

Fabric layering can take many forms, from pleats, folds, frills, and bunching, to flies, aprons, and snaps. Some skirts even create a partial/angled overlap, like this one.

Here are a couple basic examples of single to multi layer:

Front pocket:

Frilled:

Here's what low rise vs. belly draped might look like:

Short top vs. long top:

You can try cotton slips, control top tights, or even a skort to minimize the bulge.

Certain underwear will also have a flattening effect. The boxer brief achieves a sweet spot – less bunching (not a good look on skirts with thinner material), with a comfortable flattening effect:

A simple front-hanging bag can do wonders:

Bulge scorecards

Which skirts naturally hide the bulge well?

Kilt

A kilt happens to be among the best. It's made of sturdy wool with a tartan pattern, often darker in colour. The garment has multiple layers which then overlap at the front like a wrap. They drape down from the belly, and a 'sporran ' pouch traditionally hangs in front. 

Skater skirt

The skater skirt often comes in solid colours, but the layered folds give it a bulge obscuring edge even when in white:

Thin and bunched maxi skirt

Pencil skirt with fly

This skirt's fly, pockets, and sturdier fabric help to hide the bulge.

Wearing skirts while male takes courage. Ultimately, we need to find the right balance between social and physical comfort.

If you’re relatively new to skirts, start with the less bulgy options. Consider who you’ll be around when choosing your outfit, but keep in mind:

• Far less people will care or stare than you might expect
• Bulges look more obvious from the owner's view vs. someone else's

Any concern you might have will fade with experience.

As skirts become less exclusive to feminine fashion, skirted bulges will become normal. Innovation in tailoring is also making skirts more fit for the male body.

Whether you choose to obscure the bulge or not, have fun exploring the options! And don’t overthink it ;)
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